i am not pretty; nor am i ugly
i am not fat; nor am i thin
i am not brilliant; most days i feel stupid

even the
odd
average
female
deserves
love?

most days i feel like the only participant at a masquerade ball
completely
naked
push-pulled thru the crowd of masks
every once in a while
catching a glimpse behind glitter
seeing
truth
their caresses ever hiding the barbs that wound
cutting thru my thin skin
pardon me! that was not my
intention

i long to leave
run along to my
home
wrap myself in my thick woolen blanket of truth
truth that pricks and pokes
truth that will not let me sleep
on the bed that i made
built on my belief
as i strip away
that which does not belong
the b
the e
the f
laying on the lies

i tear my heart open
i sew myself shut
my weakness is that
i care too much
my scars remind me
that the past is real
i tear my heart open
just to feel